Author: Roger Edwards

The First Thing to Do When you are Depressed

The first thing to do when you are depressed is to notice it. That sentence may sound silly to you. ‘Of course, I notice it! – I feel it, don’t I,’ you might say. But not so fast. We often don’t notice what we feel. Emotions almost always have a head start over our head (our thinking). We can be hours into a mood before we put a name to it. Often, it is others who ‘helpfully’ point out that something is going on, “What’s wrong with you!” If we… Continue reading The First Thing to Do When you are Depressed

unto you

In Luke’s account of the birth of Jesus, we’re told that the shepherds “were in the same region” as Bethlehem. They were, Luke writes, “out in the field, keeping watch over their flocks by night.”  This phrase reads like poetry, because it is lyrically familiar. But you could also read it as just plain reporting. The shepherds were shepherding, exactly where shepherds usually shepherd, and shepherding, well, sheep. So far, Luke is reporting an ordinary night. Things are as they always are. This is so ordinary, so “as things always… Continue reading unto you

repent-a-gram

I’m thinking of developing a new messaging app. The distinctive feature of the app is that it won’t let you reply to an upsetting text until you’ve waited 20 minutes. Then you have to reply. I’ll market it to three different types of people: 1) The Reactionaries – those who fire off angry replies, which they later regret, 2) The People-Pleasers –  those who quickly write compliant replies, which they later resent, and 3) The Avoiders – those who give no replies, for which they later mumble lame excuses.  All that to… Continue reading repent-a-gram

how talking helps (and why we avoid it)

I am, what people might call, a talk therapist. So, I am often asked, “How does talking help?” Sometimes the undertone of the question is, “How does merely talking help? Talk is just talk, isn’t it? Don’t you need more than just talk?” It’s a fair question, because, yes, “mere talk” isn’t enough. Our life-concerns require real in-the-world choice and courageous action. But if you will allow me a strange retort; talk is never mere talk. There is more to this strange gift of language. Whenever we express ourselves, we… Continue reading how talking helps (and why we avoid it)

advent: turning toward the coming

Jean and I had been married a mere seven weeks when we learned of the “advent” (the coming) of our first child. Seven weeks. I was still alarmed to seeing woman’s shoes in the closet. I was still forgetting to plan with someone else in mind.  Now I’m being asked to make room for another someone? Advent might seem like a strange word to describe the coming of my firstborn. Isn’t advent  a “sacred” word? Yes, but the basic definition fits. Advent derives from the Latin roots; ad meaning “to” or… Continue reading advent: turning toward the coming

I can’t help how I feel

Are you familiar with the “Feeler/Thinker Doom Loop”? It’s the conflict cycle between a person who relies too much on their emotion and a person who relies too much on their rationality. Listen in on a doom loop between Emotianna and CogNate: CogNate: “What’s wrong now?” Emotianna: “Nothing.” CogNate: “But, it’s all over your face.” Emotianna: “Well if you must know, I was talking, and you just walked away. You always ignore me.” CogNate: “I was not ignoring you. You had finished. There was a distinct two-second pause which denotes… Continue reading I can’t help how I feel

what sort of greeting is this?

Luke begins his gospel with the birth story of John the Baptist, a wondrous story of an utterly implausible promise given to a barren couple. But even though the promise came to Zachariah via an angel in the temple’s holy place beside the table of incense (on the right, to be precise), Zachariah protested, “How shall I know this?” “And another thing,” he added, “I am an old man. And my wife is an ol…well, er… she’s advanced in years.” Why Zachariah thought that it would be helpful to explain… Continue reading what sort of greeting is this?

like me….please!

I discovered a website that sells “likes.” Apparently, people use them to pad their popularity on social media. But I thought I might buy some, just for me. I could sure use some “likes.” They are sold in bundles and claim that “Delivery Starts Within Minutes!” I like that, a click for instant approval! Reasonable prices, too. For just 75 cents, I can get 25 likes. That’s more likes than members in my family. No need for birthday presents or Christmas cards. This instant transaction is certainly more efficient than… Continue reading like me….please!

the way things really are

…to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God…. John 1:12 On Christmas Eve, my Mom and Dad did what parents do. They stayed up late and placed gifts under the tree. Then, on Christmas morning, I did what young children do. I got up early, making as much noise as I could to rouse the family. I was the youngest of four, the first to grow impatient about receiving, but the last to lose the innocence. Eventually though,… Continue reading the way things really are

Repent-A-Gram

I’m thinking of developing a new messaging app. The distinctive feature of the app is that it won’t let you reply to an upsetting text until you’ve waited 20 minutes. Then you have to reply. I’ll market it to three different types of people: 1) The Reactionaries – those who fire off angry replies, which they later regret, 2) The People-Pleasers –  those who quickly write compliant replies, which they later resent, and 3) The Avoiders – those who give no replies, for which they later mumble lame excuses.  All… Continue reading Repent-A-Gram