Author: Meredith Cloninger

Candles in the Window

Rescue often does not come as quickly as we want it to. Seldom does it take the shape we want it to take.  So much sturdiness and stubbornness grows up in us when rescue is delayed, when we listen to the lie that Help is not on the way. This weekend, in warm weather characteristic of this past year, my daughter and I put my ancient plastic and glass candles in the windows of our house. “Why do we put candles in our window, Mom? Why are the flames white… Continue reading Candles in the Window

Resurrection

“For the good that I want, I do not do. Instead I keep on doing the evil I do not want to do.  Who will save me from this body of death?”    Romans 7:19, 24 NASB   “First the man takes the drink. Then the drink takes the drink.  Then the drink takes the man.”     – F. Scott Fitzgerald   I have a dear friend who has spent the last five years of her life practicing nursing in a halfway house in Washington D.C. She has spent her days talking… Continue reading Resurrection

Lighthearted Confrontation

I gratefully participate in an intentional community. We who meet together do so to remind ourselves that we are actually the same size, with the same limits and powerlessness as everyone else. To remind ourselves that God alone is sovereign and able to change hearts. And to remember that fearful living is not sane living. Most of us are trying to repent of telling others the truth from broken places inside of us; places of self-deceit and fear. We’re trying to “mind our own business” but still love people who… Continue reading Lighthearted Confrontation

Learning to Rest

Today I received the gift of a few hours of uninterrupted time for myself, amidst a whole lot of summer parenting.  I have come to firmly believe that parenting is an extroverted calling.  For me to be present and enjoy my child requires that I make (what feels like) constant choices to say “no” to my penchant for producing, and for heavy internal processing.  So, when I realized I would have a little time to myself, I began to dream of all the ways I could rest. It was a… Continue reading Learning to Rest

What If Your Depression Is Trying To Speak To You?

As a culture, we don’t know how to be still. We tend to obey our inner urgency. We keep producing when we ought to let it be.  As a woman, I would rather make things happen than set down the weight of it all. As parents, we teach, lead and worry over our kids rather than hit our knees. As workers, we respond to our desire for more money by letting it dictate our schedules. And we are the most heavily medicated culture in the world. We’re medicated for listlessness,… Continue reading What If Your Depression Is Trying To Speak To You?

A Full Net

“But when the day was breaking, Jesus stood on the beach; yet the disciples did not know it was Jesus.  So Jesus said to them ‘Children, you do not have any fish do you?’ They answered Him ‘No.’ And He said to them, ‘Cast the net on the right side of the boat and you will find a catch.’  So they cast, and they were not able to haul it in because of the great number of fish.”          John 21:4-6 A group of exhausted men, out of answers and… Continue reading A Full Net

Trying to Pin the Tail on the Donkey

The other day I read a startling description by an author who I love.  She described the experience of being a little kid at a birthday party, blindfolded, and spun around, attempting to walk toward the wall to pin the tail on a donkey.  She said that when she is in seasons of stress or pain, the donkey on the wall feels like Jesus, and she’s trying to figure out where He is, stumbling toward Him, confused and disoriented.  This metaphor spoke to me, because I have lived it.  My… Continue reading Trying to Pin the Tail on the Donkey

Family Vacation

Nothing tends to surface our expectations more than time away with family.  It has been mind-blowing for me to learn that “vacationing” with a preschooler in tow is far from what it used to be.  As we neared the resort this past month, I rolled the windows down in my car, turned The Beach Boys up much too loud, and to the delight of my daughter, joined her in singing full blast.  I joined her wonder. I knew I had done nothing to earn the moment.  We were so beautiful,… Continue reading Family Vacation

Light in the Darkness

“Behold, the hour is coming, indeed it has come, when you will be scattered, each to his own home, and you will leave me alone. Yet I am not alone because the Father is with me. I have said these things to you that in Me, you might have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” John 16:32 “After this, many of His followers turned away and no longer walked with Him. And Jesus said to the twelve ‘Do you want… Continue reading Light in the Darkness

Owning

Sometimes pain becomes your friend. Doggedly faithful, it is always there to remind you of what you lost.  In the solitude that deep pain creates, you almost feel indebted. When you choose to move forward, even just a little step, it is as if you’re leaving someone important behind. If you don’t stand and bear witness to that old sadness, who else will? And what if you trip up, forgetting the lesson the pain gave you, let down your guard and crash to the ground? On the other hand, what… Continue reading Owning