Author: Palmer Trice

redemptive consequences of suffering

  I want to be a prosperity gospel kind of guy.  You know what I mean?  I want to believe in a gospel that produces prosperity for me as long as I am obedient.  I like the idea that my efforts can control my circumstances.  I used to like the idea that I would be blessed based on my level of righteousness (until I began to see a heart that was darker than I could have imagined!). And I also want to be the one that determines what prosperity is.… Continue reading redemptive consequences of suffering

Living Like I Am Loved by God

  Have you heard of the Enneagram?  It is an old personality test.  There are nine personality types with great descriptions of both their strengths and weaknesses.  The books describe how one is affected by stress and relates with other Enneagram types and does a good job of suggesting the hidden motivations of the different types. According to the tests, I am a 3–an Achiever.  That wasn’t a surprise to me.  I have always been driven to accomplish things.  I make lists, plans, etc.  The Achiever gets things done.  Some… Continue reading Living Like I Am Loved by God

A New Year

  A New Year – is it really?  My circumstances haven’t changed since yesterday.  My heart and mood and character feel the same.  The fear of reentry and reengaging with my world on January 2nd reminds me of years past.  What is new about it? On the other hand, I do find myself smiling a bit when the words come up in conversation.  There is something potentially fresh and different as we take down one calendar and put up another.  The Christmas season brings a culminating sense of finality to… Continue reading A New Year

Going Home for Christmas

This last week I found myself answering that familiar question this way: “Lynne, Kathryn, and I went home to Richmond for Thanksgiving.”  We went home. “Home” is an interesting word to use for a place that I lived almost a half century ago.  But it is where I grew up.  My three siblings, many of their kids and grandkids, and my mom all live there.   I have lived in Charlotte for forty years, yet when I go to Richmond, it is so familiar.  I bump into old friends, feel… Continue reading Going Home for Christmas

Life is a Gift

Life is a gift.  That is the topic I was given to write about.  Life is a gift.  Even though it is true, I am not so sure I like that idea. Something in me would rather earn it.  I prefer to think that there is a plan that if followed properly – diligently, with great effort and even great wisdom – then it would produce “life”.  If “gifting” is the required procedure to be followed in order to acquire “life”, then I am dependent upon someone or something.  I… Continue reading Life is a Gift

Relational Courage

There are many conversations that I am afraid to have with a wide variety of people, for various reasons.  Some of the people are more important than others.  Some of the issues are bigger than others.  But my reluctance can show up in almost any instance… Most often, I am afraid that the relational tension that might result is not worth the potential benefit.  Asking someone for a favor.  Requesting something that requires more of you than I think you want to give, or even are able to give.  Expressing… Continue reading Relational Courage

Life & Death are in the Power of the Tongue

Words really matter.  They don’t go away… especially the ones we wish would disappear, the ones we wish we could take back. Those don’t go away. Surely it has happened to you.  You are in a fight with someone you care about – like your spouse or your child.  You feel really frustrated or pushed into a corner and then out it comes.  The dagger, the sword, the bullet that pierces their heart.  And years later, the pain remains.  Occasionally, it comes up again.  They remind you.  Or you want… Continue reading Life & Death are in the Power of the Tongue

Dependence on God

By nature, the idea of depending on someone or anything seems weak, perhaps unhealthy.  For example, it’s not good to depend on alcohol.  A friend recently confided in me that alcohol is the only thing that brings relief from some very difficult life situations.  He knew enough to be worried for himself.  I was too. Depending too much on a person, even on my most special person (Lynne, my wife), can become co-dependence, meaning that I can need her too much.  She becomes too important or powerful, and in my… Continue reading Dependence on God

Marriage – Not Being Alone

I have learned something new about marriage this year.  Something that felt less significant has now become more so.  Something that once felt like a given has now become something to be valued.  Something trite has become much more meaningful. I’ve been married for 39 years.  I have been married much longer than I was single.  I share virtually everything in my life with Lynne.  We share the same friends, the same church, the same home, the same kids, the same city, and even the same family (to a meaningful… Continue reading Marriage – Not Being Alone

Forgiveness: Which is Harder?

Which is harder?  Owning my own stuff – my meanness, thoughtlessness, judgementalism… and asking for forgiveness?  Or is it harder to wipe the slate clean and let someone completely off the hook when they have really hurt me?  I’m not sure… I find myself more willing and able to see my own fallenness and less surprised too.   Jerkiness might be a more appropriate word than “fallenness.”  (Actually, there are stronger words that you can’t put on a blog.)  But over time, it is clearer and clearer to me that I… Continue reading Forgiveness: Which is Harder?